Fear creeps in as we lose our confidence and start to doubt. Many times in life we lose our confidence because of the circumstances that we are in.
We can learn from Paul who faced many challenges in the Bible.
In 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 (NASB), Paul mentioned – But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Knowing this, we can learn from Paul to stay confident and always put our hope in God because one day, all that we are going through right now will come to pass and as long as we walk in God’s ways, we will be able to see victory and let His glory be revealed.
However, it is always easier said than done, so let’s be really honest for a second.
How often do we go to God first?
God always seems to be the last resort in many of our lives whether we want to admit it or not and whether we realize it or not.
We always try to solve things our way and when things get out of hand and we are at our breaking point, then we go to God. But this should not be the way.
One thing we can do is to admit our fears and our shortcomings to God.
Run to Him first. Not to your family, not to your friends, and definitely not to social media. Don’t run away from your problems. Don’t run away from God. Run towards Him and face your problems head on.
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6 (NIV)
The only kind of fear we should have is the fear of God. A fear that regards God with reverence and awe.
“And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God require of you? He requires only that you fear the LORD your God, and live in a way that pleases him, and love him and serve him with all your heart and soul.” Deuteronomy 10:12 (NLT)
It is okay to be afraid at times as long as we know how to go to God and gain our confidence in Him. Even if it means going to Him a million times.
You know that feeling when everything just works out, God is providing and you don’t have to worry too much about anything? That genuine happiness and thankfulness for all that you have?
That is what I felt, or at least, what I thought I felt. When people asked how I was doing, I would talk about the great job I have, or my ministry that is going so well. I would say I had an assurance of knowing I am in the right place even though not everything is perfect, and of God’s guidance and peace.
I truly meant all that I said, but I had not yet realized there was more to everything that I had not yet seen.
It was only when my mentor mentioned something small that he noticed and valued about me that I could not hold back the tears. It was in that moment that I realized there was something more, something deeper that I was holding back not only from others but from myself as well.
I realized I felt unappreciated, overlooked, undervalued, not known or wanted by anyone and most of all lonely. As if it that is not enough, God revealed even more; He showed me I was also hiding this from Him too. I did not want to disappoint Him after He gave me so much! I felt like I had to be thankful for all I have and hopeful for what is coming.
It was unacceptable in my mind to not enjoy my life after being brought to a stream while wandering in the desert. I knew what I needed to do – God had been teaching me this for a long time. I had to be honest with Him and to know He loves to hear how I am and what my desires are. So there I was, kneeling in front of God, crying my eyes out, and telling Him all about how I felt. I did not know what was to come, but once again, I trusted that He has me in His hands.
To be honest, not much has changed. I am still insecure about my future in my job. I still long for seeing more growth in my ministry. I still miss having close friends who live at least in the same country, and I am desperate for the freedom to be myself without being misunderstood or judged by everyone.
However, one thing has changed. I am no longer alone for all this. I have my good Father by my side who is ready to fight for me, to take care of me and to give me everything I need even if it is not exactly what I asked for.
With God, we have the freedom to feel our feelings whatever they might be. Freedom to come to Him with everything that we are and pour our hearts out to Him because only He knows how to turn our worries into blessings and our battles into praise.
A while ago, God gave me a picture of me drowning in deep waters, gasping for air between the currents pulling me down and letting me go again and hopelessly reaching out for someone – anyone to take me out. Right after, there was a different picture. I was enjoying a gentle rain coming down on me during a hot summer day. Every one of us desires that rain that comes in just the right moment, so refreshing and joy bringing. Drowning, however, is not so pleasant at all.
God does not want us to drown in the worries this life brings. He wants to refresh us with the water but by His own terms not ours. He wants it to be life-bringing and easy. Although the outcome of drowning and the rain is the same (you’re soaking wet), the process makes a difference between death and life.
Maybe your desires are good and Godly, but if we try to force the blessings to come into our lives, if we try to do it all alone, if we pretend we are alright and if we deny our need for God, we are willingly jumping into the deep waters, willingly drowning just for the sake of getting to that water.
God invites us into a deep relationship with Him. In this relationship we can be real and open without any fear of judgement or disappointment. He invites us to look up to Him first and to trust Him that He will let the water come down in just the right time and in the right form, that will not be harmful but will bring us life in all its fullness.
“When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.” Isaiah 43:2 (NLT)
Heart pounding, thoughts going a mile a minute, scared, terrified for no apparent reason.
I was 18 when I had my last major panic attack. I was leaving college and was headed on my way home when I was hit with sheer panic and confusion. It may have been 8 years ago, but I still remember my thoughts directly after the incident. I thought:
“what’s wrong with me?”
“What is this?”
“Will it happen again?”
“What if something really bad happens when/if it happens again?”
If you cannot tell, I was a bit of a worrier at that age, and if I am not careful, I can still go into a cycle of worrying, fear and eventual panic attacks. I like order, plans, and control, but life is simply not predictable.
Honestly, anxiety makes sense in our world because of the sheer pressure we put on ourselves and on other people. My days are filled with ever ending lists, juggling jobs, ministry, bills, starting a non-profit organization, trying to maintain a normal social life for a 20-something year-old woman, and much much more, but I will spare you.
On top of all of our ever growing to-do lists, throw in unplanned life happenings, and it can turn some of us into the biggest worrywarts and anxiety-ridden folks. I cannot tell you the amount of acquaintances, coworkers, friends, and relatives I know who battle anxiety on a regular if not on a daily basis.
One day recently in the midst of my ever growing lists and unforeseen situations, I heard the Holy Spirit whispering to my heart for a slower pace and for a season of rest.
If you are anything like me, you cringe when you hear that word. I cringe not because I do not want to rest (because trust me, I really do, like really.) But my question was, how?!
How was I supposed to rest when my world was spinning? That’s when Psalms 46:10 began to ring in my ear, it says:
“Be still and know that I am God…” Psalms 46:10 (ESV)
I have always loved this passage of scripture, but up until recently, I have never dug deep into the meaning of this.
Most of us have heard this scripture before. Maybe when you read it you picture yourself waiting quietly and expectantly waiting for a whisper from Heaven. Although that is not a bad thing, when we dig deeper into this scripture we learn that the Hebrew root of be still is not “to be quiet”, but rather “to let go”.
This may sound crazy if you are a planner, a doer, and maybe even a worrier like me. Even with knowing scriptures like “who has ever added a day to their life by worrying? (Matthew 6:27)”, I still find that worry can be my initial reaction instead of faith.
Maybe you feel like that today. You worry about the big stuff and even the little things that maybe do not matter as much. I want to encourage you to let go of your anxieties and worries and place them into the hands of your Heavenly Father.
It is all little stuff to Him and fails in comparison to how BIG our God is.
So let’s position in our hearts to be still and to know…..
To know that God is making a way for that light bill to be payed.
To know God is making a way for your baby to be healed.
To know God is making a way for you to get that raise at work.
To know that God is making a way for YOU.
He is making a way that allows you to let go of every anxiety, worry, and pain, and for you to trust Him at His word that “He will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5)
Remember that God is walking through every step of life with you holding your hand, longing to carry your burdens and guide your every step. Let go of the pressure you place on yourself. You are not called to carry the weight of your burdens one little bit. Just let go and know that God is trustworthy and faithful to work all of our anxieties out all on His own if we just trust Him.
“Many put their hope in chariots, others in horses, but we place our trust in the name of the Eternal One, our True God.” Psalms 20:7 (Voice)
In just a few days, I will celebrate two years of marriage to my high school sweetheart. As I sit and reflect not only on the two years of marriage but the last 9 years we have spent together, I cannot help but thank God for each and every day.
Everyone asked after the first few months of marriage, have you had your first big fight yet? Has he gotten on your nerves?
Actually, no. A few disagreements maybe, but nothing that has kept us in a bad mood for more than a few minutes.
Some may say I lucked up with a great marriage or found my perfect match. However, fear tells me another story. Fear tells me to wait around every corner for hell to break loose in my marriage.
Marriage has always been the most terrifying thing to me. I grew up surrounded by unsuccessful marriages. Even the ones that did not end in divorce, were nothing but a prison for the two.
“Marriage is for life,” I heard growing up in church. What if I ended up trapped in a marriage that was miserable when I thought I would love this person forever?
God had to heal me a lot before my wedding day in order for me to consider committing my life to Brandon. There was no doubting I loved him. I was just afraid for so long of that love ending.
However, God placed some godly marriages in my life just when I needed it most. He restored hope that marriage could be something beautiful. In these marriages, I saw perseverance through the hard times, and love that did not waver through the decades.
So on March 25, 2017, I took a step out in faith and said “yes” to my best friend. I put on the white dress and walked down the aisle to the promise of God waiting for me at the end of it. As I said my vows, I felt an overwhelming peace. I felt gratitude that God had sent this man into my life to show me what real love was like. To this date, choosing to do life with him has been the best decision I have made (aside from giving my life to Christ).
Although my hope in marriage was restored, the devil still likes to bring back that fear. He tells me I am not good enough for my husband, and one day he will decide to leave me. I sometimes strive to be a better wife out of fear of losing him rather than my love for him.
The enemy attacks the things that are good in life and keeps you from embracing the memories to be had in the here and now.
Every time I become crippled by my fear, God reminds me of the beautiful marriages he placed in the latter part of my life. He has promised to make this marriage beautiful from beginning to end. So when the devil’s lies come, I hold on to the promises of God.
“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” Philippians 1:6 (ESV)
When the devil says, “Work harder to keep your husband”,
God says “Work less and let me carry the weight”.
“The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.” Exodus 14:14 (ESV)
When the devil says, “Your marriage will only be happy for a season”,
God says, “I renew your marriage daily and make it new”.
“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22-23 (ESV)
When the devil says, “Your husband may want to leave you for better looking woman”,
God says, “you were created for such a time as this”.
Fear cripples us temporarily, but God’s words are eternal.
Marriage will definitely have its challenges. This I am sure of. However, I also know God’s word stands, and the challenges will not end my marriage. We will walk through life’s challenges with our love still intact.
“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.” Isaiah 43:2 (ESV)
If you find yourself fearful of marriage and love because of the world around you, just know that God is writing your love story. Do not let the lies of the devil distract you from the beauty of what love can be when a relationship is centered around Christ. We need a generation of individuals ready to fight for the sake of love and marriage, not cowering in fear as the devil would have us. Because when two people choose to love like God intended, powerful things unfold.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (ESV)
As I sit writing this very blog, I am amazed by how God brought me here. The 25 years that I have been alive, He has spent molding me and preparing me for this very purpose.
Seeing God move through Unveiling Eden has been one of the best experiences. However, so much had to happen in my heart leading up to me joining this team.
I think back to 12-year-old me, writing late at night in my room. I have notebook after notebook filled with words from God, poetry, and even fictional stories. However, each entry was signed by a pen name I created because I was too afraid to ever claim my writing as my own.
Gloria Kingsley (glory to the King) was much more confident, much more talented in my mind. When God spoke to my heart that He was going to use my writing to touch people all over the world, I quickly came up with this name to hide behind. I told myself the name was out of humbleness to put the focus solely on God, but truly it was fear in my heart. Fear of what others would think of me and the words I said. Fear of criticism of my abilities to write or speak.
More often than not, God’s plans for us are scary. It takes a lot of faith and preparations.
God really had to strip me of my fears and show me how to find my voice.
I am always reminded of Moses. He was not well-spoken and begged God to send someone more qualified to free the Israelites.
“But Moses pleaded with the LORD, ‘O Lord, I’m not very good with words. I never have been, and I’m not now, even though you have spoken to me. I get tongue-tied, and my words get tangled.’
Then the LORD asked Moses, ‘Who makes a person’s mouth? Who decides whether people speak or do not speak, hear or do not hear, see or do not see? Is it not I, the LORD? Now go! I will be with you as you speak, and I will instruct you in what to say.’” Exodus 4:10-12 (NLT)
Although He will use our talents in the process, God does not look for people who are perfect. All He asks is for obedience.
Anytime that I have shared my experiences or a word that the Lord has given me, God has used it to reach at least one person.
However, each time I am going to share an important experience, my heart is flooded with fear. The devil knows the power our voice will have when it testifies of God’s goodness. He will do everything in his power to stifle your voice and make you feel unqualified.
Apostles such as Peter and Paul were very outspoken despite the pending threat of imprisonment and even death. Because of them, the name of Jesus was made known to more people than we can imagine.
In the Old Testament, Esther spoke out to save her people from persecution, when it could have ended in her own death.
Because your voice has power, it will always have opposition. However, your faith and obedience to God’s leading will be rewarded.
Your encounters with God are not meant to shape just your life. They can also impact those around you who may be going through something similar.
We should not hoard all of God’s goodness in our hearts but go proclaim it to everyone around us. When the woman at the well met Jesus, she dropped everything she was doing to go spread the word to all she knew.
“So the woman left her water jar and went away into town and said to the people, “Come, see a man who told me all that I ever did. Can this be the Christ?”” John 4:28-29 ESV
Years ago, I would let fear keep me from proclaiming God’s name. But today, His strength is enough to follow the path He has for me.
Maybe you have talents God wants to use or a story He would like you to share. Do not let the devil tell you that your voice does not matter or your story is insignificant. Turn your eyes to the one who created your mouth, and He will do the rest.
We all looked around in confusion. I suddenly realized I had not seen my 9-year-old Yorkie in the hour since we returned from watching fireworks.
After an extensive search of the entire house, we determined Bella must have somehow gotten outside in all the craziness that is July 4th. To make matters worse, we were in the Ozark Mountains, an area filled with wild animals.
The local “Lost Dog” Facebook pages made it apparent that July 4th week is a super common time for scared dogs to go missing.
My heart ached for our lost puppy, but it also ached with the realization that we are often like this with God.
When God instructs us to wait, but we allow fear to take over, we end up running towards the very things that will harm us.
Sure, “Trust God” is a cute bumper sticker slogan that gets thrown around a lot. However, when times get tough, and it seems that God has left us to fend for ourselves, that is the time when our faith is truly tested.
God promises us that if we will wait on him, He will supply us with the strength we need.
“They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as eagles. They shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31
When I’m going through a difficult time, I like to encourage myself with words of scripture. One of my favorites is Proverbs 3:5-6:
“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he will direct thy paths.”
This verse always reminds me that God created us with limited understanding, and we do not always have to know the answers. We only have to acknowledge that He is in control and allow Him to lead us.
Did you notice how this started out about waiting, but ended up being about trust?
Something the Lord has been showing me lately is that waiting and trusting go hand in hand. Learning to wait on the Lord is learning to trust Him.
Sadly, our Bella was never found. After searching a few separate times and not being able to find her, I had to pack up and go home. There was nothing else I could do.
Fortunately for us, God is not like me. God will never leave us. He will never lose us! He knows where we are at all times. He feels your pain, and He knows your sorrows. His arms are always open. No matter the mistakes you have made, if you turn back to Him, He will be there waiting with open arms.
“…for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.” Hebrews 13:5
“And the lord, He is the One who goes before you. He will be with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you’ do not fear nor be dismayed.” Deuteronomy 31:8
I believe that learning to trust the Lord completely is a lifelong journey. We may have learned to trust God with our finances, but still struggle to trust him with our health, or with our children.
What scriptures do you hold onto in the times or waiting, or when it seems difficult to trust God?
Everyone has their thing. You know that thing that you feel like you’ve conquered, but then still you have to conquer it over and over and over again.
That thing for me is fear.
Even as young children the enemy is scheming against us in the very area that God desires to use us in.
Throughout life, we go through experiences – some good and others bad. Unfortunately, some of the experiences I had as a child left me very fearful and unable to trust completely.
Even after giving my life to Christ, fear still seems to be a recurrence in my life. For me, speaking in public is something that often scares me – which is pretty ironic considering I have a degree in Communication and took speech classes growing up.
Just like that doesn’t make any sense, neither does fear!
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”1 Timothy 1:7
This scripture is proof that God has not given me a spirit of fear and does not desire for me to be fearful. Fear is simply a small scheme from the enemy in comparison to the very big God that I serve.
Over the years, I have come to realize that fear doesn’t magically disappear on its own. Even if God has completely set you free from fear, you will still be confronted with fear in life. It is when you step out in faith in spite of the fears that fear disappears.
“You don’t have enough faith,” Jesus told them. “I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it would move. Nothing would be impossible.” Matthew 17:20
The enemy’s scheme with fear is to make us believe that our fears are bigger than our God, but the truth is our faith has to be bigger than our fears.
If we truly feared God, we would fear nothing else. When I say fear, I mean a holy awe, respect, and submission God type of fear! Then we would recognize that there is truly nothing to be fearful about.
“And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him.” Hebrews 11:6
So the next time your fear is bigger than your faith, remember that God is bigger than your fears and that he is walking with you every step of the way.
“This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9