A Long Now| By Jasmine Beard

Have you ever been right on the cusp of something?

Right on the brink of breakthrough?

And boom! 

A road block, an unexpected bolder, comes between you and your dream, your promise, and that thing you have longed for for so long?

I have been there.. far too many times to count.

Waiting has at times been the first symptom of me falling into a pattern of depressed thoughts. I would think maybe God loves the girl next to me a little bit more.

This is not true, but it can really, really feel this way at times.

I had marked June as the month of promises in my mind because that is what I thought God was telling me.

When I found out it was my month of promises, I wanted to strive to make all those things I have waited so long for come to pass. This left me feeling anxious, running out of breath, and confused as to why I could not make anything happen.

God is full of infinite wisdom. I am so thankful that He is not confined by time nor space and that He protects us from things we cannot handle when they are not in the proper season or not right for us at all.

In the midst of my anxiety and my own efforts, I became hopeless. It was not the normal hopelessness that leads to moping around and believing God had no plan for me, but it was a hopelessness that made me cry out to God like never before.

I confessed to Him,

“I don’t believe in your promises because they have not manifested in my life. Because of unbelief in that area, I get anxious and want to know the end result of everything. When I grow tired of anxiety, I cut the cord to what I don’t know the answers to and try to heal from my own self inflicted wounds of unfulfilled expectations. Then I find myself on the same vicious cycle of trying to rush the healing process and repeat the cycle in another situation in my life.”

This freed me in a way that I never knew existed. I could feel in my spirit how happy God was that I brought my truth and shattered heart to Him to heal and to nurture.

Living a life of a repeated pattern of depression when things do not go my way or the way I expected is a hard one to break.

I have once heard of waiting as “a long now. While waiting could end tomorrow or ten years from now, it is still a long now.

Instead of throwing a fit about how long I have waited or how much longer I have to wait, I am now focusing on the long now that allows God to work on me and heal me from the inside out.

We have never arrived or ever gotten too mature in the Lord that will make Him not want to continue to mature, deliver, and heal us.

“And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.” Philippians 1:6 (NLT)

So June did not turn out like I had expected, but I can now say it turned out even better!

I had long ago prayed that I would be different from the past generations in my family. I prayed that I would not fall into the same patterns and traps in my life as other family members. I prayed that I would set a new standard and that I would not pass certain things along to my one day children and grandchildren.

God has answered that promise in freeing me from a cycle of hopelessness that led to depression. I will no longer pass  this onto my children.

Not to long ago, I received a prophetic word that blessed me that I want to share with you.

“I see you being a legacy changer. I feel like you are changing legacy in your family. You’re saying the ball stops here and from here on out your generations, your legacy is going to be so highlighted in your life. You are going to leave a legacy for your children, and I just see generations of generations of generations passed from you. It’s like God is setting a new course for the generations. Generations that will know the Lord and will walk with Him and that would just be set apart.”

I hope that word blessed you as much as it blesses me. You may be in a long wait right now, but I want to encourage you to see what God is doing right now and what dreams He is making come true no matter how big or small they may seem.

Remember Your Promise| By Chelsea Verdin

The lyrics to “Your Promises Never Fail” (spontaneous version) by Emmy Rose have been my fighting words for months now. And each time I listen to it, I feel greater revelation happening within me about who my God is and how powerful His promises over me are.



“For I know Your thoughts
Your plans for me are good
I know You hold
My future and my hope
Your promises never fail
Your promises never fail
And Your promises never fail
And Your promises never fail
No, no, no”

My heart has cried many times, “God, when will my prayers meet my promise?”

“When will I see what I’ve poured out my soul for come to pass?”

“When will you do it for me?”

Each time I ask these questions I am reminded of Hannah. Her story in 1 Samuel is one of my most favorites. I can relate to Hannah so strongly that I feel as if I am Hannah. She is a woman desperate for a promise to come to pass. She is taunted relentlessly by an enemy. People who loved her, who were in her corner, supporting her, but couldn’t fully grasp what grieved her. Bystanders judged her because they didn’t know her story or her heart. When I look in the mirror, all I see is a weeping, desperate Hannah.

If you are unfamiliar with the story of Hannah, I will give you a paraphrased version. Hannah shared her husband Elkanah with another woman named Peninnah. Peninnah was able to have children and did, but Hannah could not. Each year, Hannah’s husband would take them to the house of the Lord to sacrifice. He would given Hannah a double portion because he loved her even though she could not give him children. He could not understand her pain. Hannah’s rival however taunted her so relentlessly that Hannah was in great sorrow. Just as Hannah is silently pouring her desperate heart out to God, a judging priest approaches her and accuses her of being drunk. Through tears, Hannah explains her heart, and the priest quickly blesses her and sends her on her way.

My most favorite part about this story is in verses 19-20.  “and the Lord remembered her. And in due time Hannah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Samuel, for she said, ‘I have asked for him from the Lord.’”

For at least nine more months, Hannah had to be taunted by Peninnah. She had to keep praying. For at least nine more months Hannah had to use her promise as a weapon against Peninnah. She had to remind her heart and her mind what was spoken over her. She had to keep fighting and keep praying and keep singing until her cries were from labor instead of grief. She had to use her promise as a weapon until she could see it. She had to keep praying until she could meet it.

I see you woman, on your knees desperately praying for your promise to pass. I see your family and friends misunderstanding you because they do not understand your promise or your heart. I hear your rival taunting you and beckoning you to give up, to forget your promise and forget your God. I hear the bystander’s whispers and accusations as they watch your life from afar but cannot see your heart.

However, I also see our God wrapping His arms around you in compassion and mercy. I see His heartbreaking for yours and holding you still. And mostly woman of God, I hear your victory cry! Your shout of labor as you birth your promise! I rejoice with you as you continue to war for what is yours!

“Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill His promises to her.” Luke 1:45

God Keeps His Promises| By Tori Savoy

Promises sometimes can feel like empty words. When you are going through the valley, it can be hard to see the promise of the mountain top. So many times we wait so long we begin to think that the promise just does not exist.

I have been here several times in my life. Have you ever prayed for something for so long that you finally give up praying for it? You begin to accept the situation you are in instead of believing God will turn it around.

God has given me several promises in my life, some of which I am still waiting to see come to pass. However, no matter how many times He has come through, I still doubt those unfulfilled promises.

If you have been following my story, you know the last several years have been a battle with my health. I have gone from doctor to doctor trying to get answers. It has been the hardest road, but God promised He would be glorified through it.

Many have been touched by my health story, but I kept asking God, “When will I be touched? When will my healing come?”.

One thing He has taught me through this process is that He did not bring me this far to leave me here.

“‘Do I bring to the moment of birth and not give delivery?’ says the Lord. ‘Do I close up the womb when I bring to delivery?’ says your God.” Isaiah 66:9

Just because your hard season is lasting a long time, does not mean that God has abandoned you or forgotten His promise.

He recently told me my season of struggles was coming to an end. With the progress I had been making in my health, I truly felt this was going to be the end of my health struggles.

A few days later, I saw my doctor who informed me that my thyroid levels were doing much better, and it was time to lower my medicine dosage. Everything else came back doing much better, and she said I was headed in the right direction to recovery. My healing had finally come after years of prayer.

I know when you are in the middle of waiting for your promise it seems like the sun will never come up. Sometimes it feels like you will be waiting the rest of your life.

Do not give up hope. Sarah waited years for her promise of her child, but it came. The Israelites waited in captivity for the promise of a deliverer.

Your child is coming. Your deliverer is coming. He hears your prayers and knows your heart. He did not bring you through the valley to not take you up the mountain.

“Lord, I wait for you; you will answer, Lord my God.” ‭‭Psalm‬ ‭38:15‬

Pardon the Interruption|By Chelsea Verdin

My eyes were closed, and my heart was heavy. I had been wrestling with God without even noticing it, until I felt a small hand brush my arm. Instantly, I opened my eyes and looked over to my friend who was standing next to me with her baby boy. So sweetly, he reached out his arms to me, and I graciously accepted his invitation to cuddle him up into my arms.

I held my worship experience, still focusing on Jesus, but also enjoying the sweet affections from this baby boy. As he gently rested his head on my shoulder and patted my back with his tiny hand, tears filled my eyes, and an explainable peace swept over me.

A flood of emotions expanded my heart, and I just stood holding him, singing and surrendering to Jesus. This sweet boy represented the image of Christ, and in that moment, He was wrapping His arms around me and confirming me in the most tangible way.

Here’s what I learned: interruptions are divine appointments with Jesus. So many times, Jesus interrupted people’s daily lifestyles and invited them to sit with Him. Often times, Jesus’ own life was interrupted by people hungry for His ministry and desperate for His love. Each of the disciples were consumed with their own lives when Jesus chose them to follow Him. They could have rejected His invitation and went on with their lives, but instead, they embraced the interruption and gained the sweetest revelation and friendship.

When Mary was to marry Joseph, she had her life planned out. She would marry and have children. She would make a good wife and mother. Then suddenly those plans were interrupted. The angel Gabriel was sent to Mary in the middle of her wedding planning. He brought great news and an even greater invitation. Not only was Mary favored by God, but He had chosen her to birth the Messiah.

26 In the sixth month of Elizabeth’s pregnancy, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a village in Galilee,

27 to a virgin named Mary. She was engaged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of King David.

28 Gabriel appeared to her and said, “Greetings, favored woman! The Lord is with you!”

29 Confused and disturbed, Mary tried to think what the angel could mean.

30 “Don’t be afraid, Mary,” the angel told her, “for you have found favor with God!

31 You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you will name him Jesus.

32 He will be very great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his ancestor David.

33 And he will reign over Israel forever; his Kingdom will never end!”

34 Mary asked the angel, “But how can this happen? I am a virgin.”


35 The angel replied, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the baby to be born will be holy, and he will be called the Son of God.

36 What’s more, your relative Elizabeth has become pregnant in her old age! People used to say she was barren, but she has conceived a son and is now in her sixth month.

37 For the word of God will never fail.”

38 Mary responded, “I am the Lord’s servant. May everything you have said about me come true.” And then the angel left her.

-Luke 1:26-38

How differently would things look if Mary would have rejected God’s offer and decided to proceed with her wedding untouched by the Holy Spirit?

Interruptions are invitations to sit with Jesus. He invites us to be still with Him that we may learn and know who He is.

“Be still, and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world.” -Psalm 46:10

That we may honor Him and make space within our busy lives to accept the hand selected task that He specifically creates for us.

Sometimes, we see the interruptions as distractions from the plans we have mapped out for ourselves, but what if we chose to see them as encounters with Jesus. Moments to talk to Him or get alone with Him in the midst of our chaotic lives? How differently we would be if we met one of His interruptions with the heart of Samuel as he tried to sleep and the Lord called to Him several times in the middle of the night.

“Speak Lord, your servant is listening.” -1 Samuel 3:10

God has been teaching me to come away with Him in the middle of the chaos. When the noise all around me is trying to silence His voice in my life, He reassures me that solitude is not just about being alone. It is about who we are alone with. He uses the embrace of a child to confirm me and to remind me that I am still His, He is still mine, and He is good always.

Friend, if you look around you will notice Him speaking too. Maybe not always audible as we would like, but always speaking to the heart of who we are.

Like a sunset taking away the day, some interruptions are meant to be beautiful invitations to be still and know.

Trusting God in a Season of Waiting| By Christina DePino

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“Where is Bella?”

We all looked around in confusion. I suddenly realized I had not seen my 9-year-old Yorkie in the hour since we returned from watching fireworks.

After an extensive search of the entire house, we determined Bella must have somehow gotten outside in all the craziness that is July 4th. To make matters worse, we were in the Ozark Mountains, an area filled with wild animals.

The local “Lost Dog” Facebook pages made it apparent that July 4th week is a super common time for scared dogs to go missing.

My heart ached for our lost puppy, but it also ached with the realization that we are often like this with God.

When God instructs us to wait, but we allow fear to take over, we end up running towards the very things that will harm us.

Sure, “Trust God” is a cute bumper sticker slogan that gets thrown around a lot. However, when times get tough, and it seems that God has left us to fend for ourselves, that is the time when our faith is truly tested.

God promises us that if we will wait on him, He will supply us with the strength we need.

“They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as eagles. They shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31

When I’m going through a difficult time, I like to encourage myself with words of scripture. One of my favorites is Proverbs 3:5-6:

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he will direct thy paths.”

This verse always reminds me that God created us with limited understanding, and we do not always have to know the answers. We only have to acknowledge that He is in control and allow Him to lead us.

Did you notice how this started out about waiting, but ended up being about trust?

Something the Lord has been showing me lately is that waiting and trusting go hand in hand. Learning to wait on the Lord is learning to trust Him.

Sadly, our Bella was never found. After searching a few separate times and not being able to find her, I had to pack up and go home. There was nothing else I could do.

Fortunately for us, God is not like me. God will never leave us. He will never lose us! He knows where we are at all times. He feels your pain,  and He knows your sorrows. His arms are always open. No matter the mistakes you have made, if you turn back to Him, He will be there waiting with open arms.

“…for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.” Hebrews 13:5

“And the lord, He is the One who goes before you. He will be with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you’ do not fear nor be dismayed.” Deuteronomy 31:8

I believe that learning to trust the Lord completely is a lifelong journey. We may have learned to trust God with our finances, but still struggle to trust him with our health, or with our children.

What scriptures do you hold onto in the times or waiting, or when it seems difficult to trust God?

When God Doesn’t Move The Mountain| By Tori Savoy

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Faith is strong enough to move mountains, but what will happen to your faith when the mountain does not move?

“God moves mountains” has become a common phrase in Christian culture. The mountain is a metaphor for the trials and tribulations standing in our way. It is another way of saying “God can do the impossible” if you have the faith necessary, which is completely scriptural and true.

However, we sometimes forget that while God CAN accomplish the impossible in our lives, it may not always be the exact miracle we were praying for.

About two years ago, I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease, and the journey has been one of the hardest I have ever experienced. Not only did it begin to deteriorate my physical health, my mental health began to be greatly impacted. Depression and anxiety are common symptoms of this condition, and boy did those hit me hard. It was hard for people to understand exactly what I was going through, and I always felt like I was a burden to those around me. I had never felt so alone in my life. On numerous occasions, my symptoms got so hard to deal with that I even asked God to end my life so I could be free of the pain.

With tears rolling down my face, I cried out to God one night asking why he was not taking away this pain.

I heard a soft whisper from above, “My child, you are waiting for me to move a mountain that I intended for you to climb.”

For years, I always heard that mountains move. Never did I consider climbing one.

“Climb it? But what for? Why is this my mountain to climb? Why can’t I climb a different mountain?” my frustrated mind asked God.

But you see, I did not need to know the answer to that. I needed to just have faith in his plan.

Faith does not only move mountains. Faith can transform us and take us places we never thought we would go before.

Hebrews 11:1 says “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”

Faith is taking a step out (or up a mountain) into the unknown, facing something scary before us, and serving God despite not knowing what will happen in the end.

So on that difficult night, I decided to use my pain to bring God glory. To trust him, pack up my climbing gear, and aim for that mountaintop. No matter how difficult the climb got, I knew that as I ascended up the mountain I was further away from that valley below me.

And boy does the top of that mountain have a gorgeous view! Once I reached the top, I finally saw the beauty of his master plan in its entirety as I looked down on the valleys that once held me captive.

The climb has shaped me into who I am, brought me closer to God, and allowed me to have more compassion for others’ struggles.

What will happen to your faith when the mountain doesn’t move? Will you camp out in your valley and loathe in self pity, or will you take on that mountain with full faith?

“I lift my eyes to the mountains where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.” Psalms 121:1-2